Sometimes we are more comfortable with our habits, as self-destructive as they may be, than with change. I’ve heard it said that it takes 30 days to create a new habit. That may not seem like a long time, but if you compare it to the years of behaving a certain way without giving it a second thought, 30 days is a long stretch of time for focusing awareness, intention, and action. Don’t minimize how much commitment it takes to implement permanent change. That way, when you do stick with your new commitment, you will have a well-deserved experience of accomplishment.
Sometimes our self-sabotage runs deep. We may think we want to lose weight, quit drinking, or start exercising but we may have underlying fears or limiting beliefs that keep us in a vicious circle:
1. I need to change
2. I want change
3. I am changing
4. I am afraid of changing
5. This change is too foreign for me/doesn’t fit my picture of myself/I’ll get rejected if I change too much/I’m scared
6. I am a failure at making this change
7. I need to change…
If the above sounds all-too-familiar to you, here are some important tips for making and keeping commitments:
1. Don’t commit out of guilt or embarrassment. Those feelings are fleeting and won’t take you the distance. Commit out of a true desire to build your self-esteem, maximize your health, or nurture your spirit in some way.
2. Tell someone else who is supportive about the commitment you are making. The more we put it out there, the more likely we are to keep an agreement with ourselves.
3. Do something every day towards your goal.
4. Don’t make excuses. If you slack off, admit it to yourself. Then forgive yourself immediately.
5. Reward yourself along the way. Remember that life is a journey, not a destination.
About Jane
Jane Straus is a trusted life coach, dynamic keynote speaker, and the author of Enough Is Enough! Stop Enduring and Start Living Your Extraordinary Life. With humor and grace, Jane offers her clients and seminar participants insights and exercises to ensure that the next chapter of their lives is about thriving as the unique individuals they have always been and the extraordinary ones they are still becoming. She serves clients worldwide and invites you to visit her site, StopEnduring.com. Here you will find excerpts from her book, more articles, TV and radio interviews, and clips from her presentations.
She is also the author of The Blue Book of Grammar and Punctuation, Grammarbook.com, an award-winning online resource and workbook with easy-to-understand rules, real-world examples, and fun quizzes.
Contact Jane at Jane@JaneStraus.com.